written on November 7, 2014
I’m not sure I’ve completely explained the reasons why I’m staying in an apartment with my parents, and not back at home with my wife and kids.
My wife went home the day after the transplant, and the first week she was home, she had several people helping her at different times with the kids. Her only medication post-surgery was pain medication.
I, however, have been in isolation since the surgery. The first four weeks is when I’m at the highest risk for infection - any kind of infection. And me getting sick right now would be bad. Most likely it would result in me going back to the hospital for several days to a week. All because the drugs I’m taking are keeping my immune response very low. I’ve been healthy since the transplant, but I can tell my immune system is not working that well. I’m taking forever to heal. I still have the bruise in my left arm from where they removed the surgical IV three weeks ago. For me, having a bruise for three weeks is almost unheard of. Three days is a typical bruise time frame for me.
The hole where they had the drainage tube after the surgery didn’t completely heal up until just a few days ago – that probably took a while also because I kept the gauze on it for the first two weeks. It definitely started healing faster once I took the gauze off for good.
This isolation period didn’t mean I couldn’t go home – it just meant that if I went home, I’d have to be very cautious. My kids are little germ factories at this age, so I would have to wear a mask around them all the time. As I’ve noticed, my son really hates it when I wear a mask. Although I did go home the other morning to help take them to school and he just could not stop hugging me and hanging on to my legs. Clearly the mask didn’t bother him that day.
Plus, we have a cat. Right now being around the cat is not good at all, especially since I’m still allergic to cats. My allergies don’t really seem to be that active, however – normally when my immune system is shut down I don’t have any allergies at all. This annoying cough I still have is making my doctors and nurses think it’s caused by allergies, but I don’t think that’s true. All I know is I’ve been taking my Zyrtec again and it’s not doing anything for the cough.
Back to the cat – I’m not supposed to change her litter box ever again (and our cat loves to poop on the floor outside the litter box, which is even worse) and she’s not supposed to sleep on the same bed with me (problem – she loves cuddling next to my wife every night, so how are we going to handle that?).
There’s also the reality that every time I’m home during the day, when the kids aren’t home, if I’m feeling good and there are things that need to be done around the house, I tend to want to do them. Which would be bad for me now also. I am really spending a lot of time doing nothing, or doing low-energy stuff. My parents have been great – they’re cooking and cleaning for me, doing laundry and dishes and really letting me just take it easy every day. I’m so appreciative of this opportunity to have a few weeks to actually rest.
As much as I miss my family, I love knowing that when I do finally go home in a couple of weeks, I should be almost back to “normal.” I’m expecting my energy levels to be good, I’m expecting to be stronger than I’ve been in a long time and I think being home will make me appreciate my life all the more.
Sometimes missing the kids is really tough, but it’s only for a short time and it’s worth it in the long run if I stay healthy. Because staying healthy and well for the next 25 years to life is what I’m going for. I don’t want, or expect, any rejection episodes or illnesses. I’ve got a new kidney, a new lease on life, and I’m planning on taking full advantage of all the opportunities I’ve got ahead of me.